As my husband is racing out the door to take his motorcycle to the track, I say, "Gee, I wish I could just take off anytime I wanted to and do something fun."
He stops in his tracks.
"Honey, you get to..." he trails off.
I wanted to say,"When do I get to? Seriously, name a time?"
Instead I say, "You go and have fun, but don't complain to me if I want to just take off sometime."
"That's not fair. I let you go out."
LET ME?!! He's just digging himself into a hole now. I thought parenthood was about teamwork, right?
I'm not really trying to make him feel guilty, I just want him to understand.
How often do I get to just stop at the gas station on a whim and go inside and get myself the super-sized Diet Coke that I am craving without having to unbuckle two young kids and take them kicking and screaming inside because Social Services will take them away from me if I don't. Then I'd have to buy candy and drinks for them because it's not fair that mommy gets a drink and they don't. Then a buck turns into five dollars! I can't afford it! I have the same problem at a drive-thru. I can't win.
Yeah, I've given this a lot of thought.
Being a mom comes with a little cage that you get locked in to with little cell mates that are totally dependant on you. So many times I need to just run somewhere and do something but I put it off because I can't muster up the energy to find two extra pairs of shoes, wrestle with surprisingly strong little legs to put the shoes on, change two diapers, remember to pack two more in my bag, etc. Just to unload them from the car and wrestle with them while I do one quick little errand that turns into a hair-pulling mess.
So, yes, sometimes I feel trapped. My cell mates are delightful for the most part, and I enjoy my little cage (I wouldn't have it any other way), but the lack of freedom tends to get to me. I don't even get to use the bathroom in private!
Thus, I sigh, "I wish I could take off any time I want to and do something fun."
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Oh my goodness-- I feel the exact same way today. I have had a long week. Josh has been on inpatient service meaning his hours are 6-6pmish. So, I get them up, get them dressed, feed them, take them to school, dance, etc, feed them dinner, bathe them and so on. I am exhausted, not to mention Asher decided not to nap this week. So today, Saturday, day before my big 30...you would have thought he would have tried to make it special. No, first he asks me if I found a babysitter so we can go to dinner. Excuse me? His excuse: I don't know any babysitters....Then tonight I want to go to dinner but I asked the kids to do a few things. Well, in a hurry they run out to the car, well I tell him that I asked them to clean-up etc so I would have to do it when we get home, and he unbuckles them all and storms in the house with somefish from the freezer. This made me mad...I like fish, but I don't want it for my birthday. So, I told him, he says "Todd bad!" Then proceeds to throw them at me and storm off saying he has to go to work. Now I am home exhausted, crying and hungry while he is by himself, and thinking, why is it that everytime I want to leave for a cool-down that I cannot just go? I have 5 little ones to think about. He gets mad...on my "almost" birthday and he can leave without a consequence! UGH! I would never storm out on my kids, but I think you know what I mean! So, today I feel like he is a jerk...besides I think of all the months he had to himself while he was travelling for rotations back then. He can go potty alone, eat alone....I am so with you Diana...Let's vent together. Hey thanks for making me feel better!
ReplyDeletelol...I feel the same way :) Nate tries to "let me out"--but moms just don't get it that way. I especially feel that way right now with a 5 week old! I might be able to get out, but I have to be back quickly so I can feed the baby!
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