Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Just to Lie there

I have a problem with falling asleep. I do. Who, me?! Yes, I have no trouble staying asleep, it's the actual process of falling asleep that gets me frustrated. I used to be able to sleep sitting up in my desk in junior high or on my arm in Psychology. I could be drooling in two seconds on an airplane or car ride. Now, I have too much going on in my head to sleep. I have to check on my kids at least twice before I feel it's safe to fall asleep. I also have to have the next day planned out in my head or written down before I can fall asleep. I have to have a lunch made for Matt, the kitchen clean, dishwasher running, washed my face, brushed my teeth, peed, read my scriptures, prayed, and set my alarm before I can fall asleep. Lately, I have had to make sure I'm wearing my robe for protection, so Cory won't climb in bed with me during the night and wiggle his cold feet up under my shirt to warm them on my back. I also have to put lotion on, yuck. Not to mention the pillows being situated perfectly so my head, neck, back, and knees are supported.
No, it is not easy to fall asleep. My mind seems to go wild while I lie there. I used to get so frustrated! My doctor gave me a muscle relaxer to help me fall asleep because I am too agitated to do it on my own. Which was just one more thing I had to do before falling asleep.
Then, one night, a thought came to me. Call it the voice of God, the Spirit, or whatever, but it was not my own thinking. This thought said to me, "Just be content to lie there and relax."
It worked! I don't have to take my medication anymore because I just lie down and relish in the fact that I can. I can just lie there. I just focus on the PRIVILEGE of being horizontal in the most comfortable position in the most comfortable bed.


Does anyone else get agitated by noise? I have to admit that I get testy when I hear unnecessary noise. Nothing gets me like whistling, and no, it's not because I can't do it! My husband likes to whistle, and it annoys me like crazy. I know he does it on purpose just so I'll say, "Matt! Stop it!" and then he'll innocently look at me like I've hurt his feelings.
Tapping, and drumming, and "beat boxing" (I don't know how to spell that at all), are all unnecessary noise. Even singing bugs me.
One time in junior high after musical practice, I was waiting for a ride home, when one of the other girls in the cast walked up to me and started singing to me right in my face. Not only was she invading my personal space, but she wouldn't shut up. To this day, I HATE that song she was singing. No, I'm not going to tell you what it was because I know that one of you will start singing it around me just to see my reaction. Naughty, naughty.
Why, you may ask, does a music-lover like myself not like these things? Let me tell you, it's the way they are "performed". Whistling is too shrill, "beat-boxing" and drumming is too repetitive and it goes no where. It's like singing Mary Had a Little Lamb and leaving out the last word.
For example:
"Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb. Mary had a little lamb her fleece was white as"

Doesn't it just drive you crazy that the last word wasn't said?!!

I studied music in college, but I would never profess to be a professional, or someone of any merit who could critic a singer, but there are some voices that rub me the wrong way.

James Taylor, for example, his voice sounds so nasal, I think he needs some kind of decongestant. I know Matt listens to him just because it bugs me.

Britney Spears sounds like she is going to choke to death on her own vocal chords.

John Mayer sounds like an evil rapist.

Now, I don't want you thinking that if you get up, say in Sacrament Meeting, and I am in the congregation, and you sing a solo, that I will be thinking, "He/She didn't support that note enough", or "He/She definitely should NOT be up there," or "I could do better", or "OHMGOSH make it STOP I am IN PAIN!"
No! I am NOT thinking any of those things at all. In fact, I know that is what people are thinking when I get up to sing.
Actually, I am sitting in that congregation green with envy that you have the courage to get up in front of all those people and sing.

When I say that unnecessary noise annoys me, I am saying that there is a time and a place for noise.
While I am trying to get dinner on the table and having a discussion with my husband and my kids are beating each other up, is not the time for unnecessary noise.
Thus the reason I freaked out at my family at dinner tonight.
Kevin started this really annoying scream, Cory was growling at him, Matt had the news on TV, and he was telling me about his day all while I was trying to sneak salad dressing into the salad before Cory could see.
You know that old saying, "Her blood started to boil".
That's exactly how I felt. I could feel the steam rising from my head. I yelled, "Quiet! I NEED QUIET!"
Is that too much to ask?

8:00PM-midnight is happy time for my ears. The kids are in bed, Matt is studying, and there is no unnecessary noise. Ahhh. Do you see why I am reluctant to go to bed?